Friday, August 14, 2009

Moving Forward

"Live your life with greater courage, intensity and kindness." Oprah Winfrey

Whatever happened - whatever I survived - I want to use it to give hope to someone. Hope that life can turn around - that things can change - that addictions can be beat - that life can have purpose.

It never really dawned on me how bad things had been until I started writing and blogging. I stared at the words on the screen. I read and reread them. My own words - my own thougths shocked me. I had pushed it away - pretended it all hadn't happened. It hurt too much too remember. But when I started writing I couldn't stop. It's as if a damn had opened......

I want God to use what I lived - I want to help others. I don't want to think He freed me for nothing. Maybe if I can use what I survived, then all that horrible stuff wouldn't have been in vain.

I'm working on courage - courage to physically face someone and tell - I keep telling myself I am not what happened to me. I'm going to keep telling myself that until I believe it - until I have the courage - Meanwhile I want to reach out in kindness cause I know everyone is fighting some kind of battle.

18 comments:

Debbie Thorkildsen said...

Just wanted to remind you that something good has already come from what you survived - we became friends. I know God is going to do so much more with what you suffered and He will be glorified by your sharing what He has brought you through. You do not ever have to go it alone - I'm here for you. Keep sharing.

speck of dust said...

I believe that everything happens in the right order at the right time, there is no need to rush anything. My therapist always said 'what makes you think you won't do that?' when I complained of all the things I couldn't do. And he reminded me to accept where I am now. I have the same desire as you and have felt frustrated that fear and anxiety etc. holds me back. I think the first step is having the desire and putting faith in the force from God that is bigger than us and will help us realise those desires x thinking of you

Anonymous said...

Sarah, you have more courage than you know. Writing about your painful past takes courage. Writing a "tell all" book takes courage. You are courageous my sweet Sarah. You are so helping others more than you know. There may be some reading how you survived and overcame the pains, hurt, bitterness and anger, yet they are not commenting. Keep writing and telling all your story my friend. You are indeed helping someone each time you write. Stay positive. Stay focused. Keep your eye on the Lord.

I heard this yesterday and I want to share it with you:

IT IS NOT WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH, IT IS WHAT YOU'RE ARE GOING TO.

I know in my heart Sarah that you are getting ready to go places with your story which will leave you in awe. Wait for the Lord to start moving you my friend.

God bless

I love you.

One Prayer Girl said...

God is happy that you are allowing Him to use your experiences, your writing to help so many others that He loves and wants to help. He does so through you.

You are blessed by that,
PG

Andrea said...

Writing is a therapy for me, as well as a tool GOD uses to help others. Isn't it amazing how detailed GOD's plan is....he is using our writing to heal our hearts and at the same time to work miracles in the lives of others. HE blows me away! HE IS AWESOME!
Blessings, andrea

Anonymous said...

Hi Sarah,

I used to wonder why God let me go through so much, too. It has made compassionate and God has used my pain to help others, too. I remember how hard it was to say I was food addict. The first time was the hardest.

Thanks for sharing. :)

Tammy

A.R.K. said...

"Everyone is fighting some kind of battle." Yeah...a good thing to remember whenever you feel like you happened to get all the bad luck. Writing's excellent therapy, it always helps me clear out my tangled thoughts. Hope it continues to help you. <3

Denise said...

Believe me sweetie, you are very courageous, and you have a kind heart.

Paula said...

I agree with the others. You are very courageous. WE who have been abused arent good in regocnizing and / or accepting positve traits about ourselves. And fear is holding us back. I came to believe that courage means there is something more important than our fear. In my eyes you have recognized this already and you are on your way to yourself.
Love across the pond

Just Be Real said...

Dear one, you give me courage to continue! God WILL use what "you" lived! All in the right time!!!!

So honored to know you! ♥

Susan said...

Our greatest hurts become our greatest healing. Our broken-ness becomes our strength.
Be gentle with yourself. You're an amazing person.

Laura said...

We are all like ripples in a pond. Our lives reach out and touch others. Never forget that. You make a difference.

TFW said...

Sarah thank you for stopping by my blog. I am sorry that some of the words used caused you pain. I too am a survivor of Childhood abuse. For 10 tens I suffered abuse from two separate step fathers…it began when I was 6. My story of healing is shared openly on my blog.

Ardy said...

Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 3:13,14 / KJV

God bless you Sarah!

Ardy said...

Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 3:13,14 / KJV

God bless you Sarah!

Vicki Johnson said...

This is a courageous and bold post.
You are so very brave Sarah. I thank God for your strength.

Vicki

Terri Tiffany said...

I wish we lived closer as I know we could talk and share and I would encourage you to keep telling others as I know you will affect many!

Patricia Singleton said...

Writing about my own incest experiences was and continues to be what helps my recovery from incest the most. Thanks for having the courage to write about your own experiences with abuse.