Sunday, August 9, 2009

The Power of Nature

"The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature." Anne Frank

I don't do good when I'm around people too much. I crave alone time. When I'm around too many people too much of the time, my mind goes into frantic mode. I stop listening. I stop being present. I daydream about the woods, the mountains, the water. I envsion the birds - the deer and I can even smell the sweetness of the earth. The pull to be outside is so strong. In nature - in the woods - I feel safe. I feel free.

I think nature has to be God's gift to us. If I wasn't so scared of the dark, I would probably live in the forest, up on a mountain somewhere.

I spent a lot of time locked up - My father used to lock me in his car in the worse part of the city for hours by myself. I was terrified. I prayed he would come back and get me. He always did. As a kid I spent hours hiding in a closet, under the balcony or in the basement, holding my breath, afraid to move - terrified, listening, waiting - like an animal being stalked.

The rapist held me for six months. In the cold, in winter, in the snow - with no shoes, no coat - I escaped. I climbed over a six foot high gate to freedom. When I couldn't stop throwing up, cutting myself, shooting dope - they locked me on a psych ward. Threatened to keep me locked up until I stopped the destructive behaviour.

Confined. Trapped. I hate those feelings. Maybe that's why I love being outside. There I hear God's whisper in my heart. I feel His gentle touch. I feel His strength.

16 comments:

RCUBEs said...

I'm glad that you were able to find that solace that comes from His loving arms. Whatever hurt the world did to you, is nothing comparable to the mending power of God. May you continue to seek that place where He wants you restored. God bless.

Rhonda said...

I too do not do well around many people. It can be something as simple as a house full of family members. I do best being one on one with someone. I love sitting outside just listening to the rain or the wind blow. It is so soothing to the soul.

I am so sorry for what you have experienced in your lifetime. {{{HUGS TO YOU SWEET ONE}}}

Andrea said...

U have an award at arise 2 write!!

Anonymous Drifter said...

Like Rhonda, I also do best being one on one with people. You've been through so much. Thank God there's a place where you can find solace.

Gin said...

I am glad that you are able to find some comfort with nature. You have been through so much. What a strong person you are.

Terri Tiffany said...

I like my alone time too but I also LOVE people:) I guess that is a good blend. How do you do it as a social worker? Aren't you with people 24/7?

Denise said...

There is sweet freedom in His precious arms, bless you dear.

Finally Free said...

I live by the ocean. I love to go there and just sit sometimes. I love to go in my back yard and look at the butterflies. They are my favorite.

God encourages me with the butterflies when I am having a bad day. They make me smile. :)

Madison said...

I hope you live in a place where this peace is everywhere. You deserve time alone with God.

Just Be Real said...

How precious to hear God's whisper. My dear one precious hugs go out to you!

I really used to love to take nature walks and do what I called "mind walks" and enjoy the beauty. Hopefully, can get back to doing that.....

Epiphany said...

:)

speck of dust said...

Hi Sarah, thanks for joining my blog. I feel exactly the same about needing to be in nature. It has taken me a while to realise I have to allow myself the things I need without judging myself. I wrote a poem about an amazing experience I had walking on my own in the country while in the midst of severe depression. I will post it for you.

VICKI IN AZ said...

Sarah,
Thank you for sharing this important part of your life with us. Nature is such a gift, I agree.
I am so happy that you find peace there and healing I hope from all that you have faced.
Your spirit is strong and so very sweet, thank you for sharing your spirit.
I listened to your playlist a few times today while I was working on the computer. Lovely healing songs filled with so much hope.
You are filled with hope.

Vicki

Sharon Faith said...

My sweet Sarah, through all that you went through you are now beginning to heal. You are a SURVIVOR my friend. You are a SURVIVOR! Do not be afraid of the dark, as it can not harm you. God is the Light which protecting you. I know when you were going through traumatic times in your life you do not feel or know God was there right with you. He saw you through, He is seeing you through right now. Ask the Father to remove your fears of the dark. Ask Him to replace the fears with Hope and security in Him.

My dear sweet Sarah, your life and what you went through is your personal testimony of what God can do for you. He has turned your ashes into beauty. He has turned your mourning into joy. He has turned your weakness in to strength. You have survived and now you are sharing your story with others and letting them know that they to can survive and will survive. Keep sharing your story. Keep letting others know that there is hope in God.

You are more than a conqueror my sweet Sarah. You are in fact a SURVIVOR and a CHILD of the MOST HIGH GOD.

I am so very, very proud of you.

I love you very much.

When ever you need to talk or just someone to listen to you, although I am not physically with you, I am just an email away and I am with you always in spirit. You are my adopted daughter in Christ. I love and care for you deeply.

Epiphany said...

Wow I want to be your friend now too Sharon Faith!!

Paula said...

Seldomly feel as "whole" as in nature. Can relate very much. Hugs to you. Thanks for sharing.