Friday, February 25, 2011

Perfectly Perfect

“In nature, nothing is perfect and everything is perfect. Trees can be contorted, bent in weird ways, and they're still beautiful.” Alice Walker

I couldn't stand to be looked at.....I hated to be seen. Whenever someone looked in my eyes I thought they could see in them what I knew...that I was...stupid....garbage... worthless....all those things I had been told. I kept thinking I needed to change...to be more like someone else or at least the way others told me I should be.... 

Funny thing about lies....they sound and feel so much like truth. My girls are very different from each other...the way they move in the world....the things they like....the way they approach things....In my eyes though.....both of them are perfect just the way they are.

When I had my youngest, my oldest was four. One night as I was putting her to bed, I asked her....Are you jealous of the baby?  I've never forgotten her answer.
No. She said. She's the best girl she is and I'm the best me I am. 

I was blown away by her words. I still am. Her amazing insight helped me to begin accepting the truth that I didn't need to be anybody but me....no more twisting to fit someone else's idea or expectations of who, what or how I should be....

I love the differences in my girls. I love that they see and do things unique to them. It's what makes our life together pretty fun. 

Being a mom....loving my kids - the good things about them and even the not so good things....has taught me He's made everyone unique and perfectly perfect the way we are. That means me too. It's the quirks....those little things that drive us.....the flaws....those traits....and habits I hated about me - now I see they're just a part of who I am. 

Watching my kids.....loving them for who they are...has helped me challenge those lies I carried....lies that insisted I wasn't good enough. I've learned...being perfect means being flawed....it's part of the beauty of who we are.

23 comments:

Joanne Sher said...

This is such - SUCH - a wonderful, powerful reminder of our worth in God's eyes. I will remember this.

Andrea said...

Thank you! I needed to read this, today! Your post touched my heart deeply.
GOD BLESS as you continue to touch the lives of so many!
Hugs,
andrea

Finding Pam said...

Wonderful words today. Your children are so healthy in ways that I never could be. Isn't is good to see that love triumphs over all.

I am rewriting those childhood tapes at sixty years of age. I see that nothing in impossible.

Thank you for sharing you world with us. You make a difference to a lot of people.

Anonymous said...

iM SO PROUD OF YOU!
I know those words hurt and i can say i know exactly how you feel.
my word for this year is courage and to love me. I can proudly say to myself now, "i love you cry"
I have the courage and the armour of My God!

Skip said...

You go girl. It is incredible how far you have come. My most loved thriver

Chatty Crone said...

Your daughter sounds like one smart gal. I can't believe she knew that at age four.

She knew the secret of life - that we are all different and that we are all good. God loves us all.

Sometimes we have been fed lies and have started to believe them.
We need to tell ourselves every day that they are not true and that we have value.

Soon we will start to believe it and then be back on the right track.

Thanks to you - she was on the right track to begin with.

Love,
sandie

Anonymous said...

Wow. I am also blown away by your daughter's response. It's so wise. And I'm also glad you have chosen to live your live according to that sentiment. That's what a big part of recovery is: accepting who we are for who we are.

Wishing you well,
NOS

Sheila Deeth said...

What wonderful words your daughter gave. Thank you for sharing them!

Mary said...

I love hearing this...what you daughter said, what you are learning about yourself...God's transformation is beautiful on you.

Grace and Peace

Crown of Beauty said...

I read this last night as I was about to log off... and thought of reading it again this morning before giving my response. THere is so much depth and beauty to your words: "being perfect means being flawed...it's part of the beauty of who we are."

How I love that thought, Nikki. Somehow, it struck me this morning as I was doing a bit of early morning gardening. I thought of taking pictures of common, ordinary, imperfect sights around our neighborhood - the rusty road signs, the unswept leaves on the sidewalk... beauty in the imperfect was the thought that came to mind.

My life isn't perfect,not even what I planned it, or wanted it to be... but you are right, it's part of the beauty of who we are.

Thanks for this post!

Love
Lidj

Unknown said...

Wow, those words your daughter spoke to you were perfect. I needed to hear them, too. Thank God for our children, right? Thanks for sharing :)

Puzzled Hat said...

This is so insightful! Thanks for posting it! :)

Velvet Over Steel said...

My 2 sons are totally unique in their interest, talents and personalities too. All are great young men though & make me so proud. Love them so very much too! Beautiful Post!!! Thanks for sharing!
HUGS,
Coreen xoxoxo

Patti Hanan said...

Your daughter's words are so wise at the age of four. We are all unique, and beautiful in the way God made us. We are not perfect now, but one day we will be. He who began a good work in us will complete it. Your writing is profound.

Anonymous said...

Sarah,

I think many people (myself included) need to read this post. It's important to remember that God made all of us different for His glory and purpose, and therefore, we are not created to "be like someone else." However, it can be difficult to accept our "oddities," in a world that craves for us to "follow the crowd."

This was a beautiful story. Thank you for sharing it with us. BTW, your daughter has a heart of gold. :)

Blessings,

-Lady Rose

Dulce said...

Reading you evry wekk is a great pleasure.
i love the uplifting you give us here... i feel a bit more perfect now

Sharon said...

Sarah - this was just so nice. And I really needed this word of encouragement today. (And your oldest - what a very wise soul she is).

Lovely...just the way I am.

Oh thank you, Lord - for that wonderful truth. I am who I am...and I am your beloved Daughter.

GOD BLESS, Sarah - you are beautiful.

Anonymous said...

This made me want to cry. I love love loved this post!

Charlotte/For Such A Time As This said...

I agree, it is our flaws that make us unique, and usually they are the very thing God can use for His glory. I have battled with having flaws. I though of them as weaknesses. Then I learned that God's strength is made perfect in weakness...so now I'm thankful for my flaws.

Starry Dawn said...

Hi sweet Sarah,
Thank you for joining My New Blog!! I am so happy to see you visiting me, Sarah dearest.
Welcome Aboard at anytime!!
I also follow your wonderful blog with great food for thoughts, and thoughts provoking topics. I just love reading your compositions. They inspire me with the sublime touch of your wonderful heart.
God may bless you all, Sarah, and those you love!!
All the Best,

Starry.

Mya said...

Your daughter seems to be wise beyond her years, but I will bet that she has picked up attitudes from you, maybe more than you realized you were teaching.
Unfortunately some people pass on there sad life experiences to their young, keeping a desastrous train moving forward, but you have not only put the brakes on, you have given your family a lovely, safe direction to go.

Deborah Ann said...

YES! Being perfect DOES mean being flawed. I think we tend to forget that God loves us just the way we are. Each one of us is unique and very special to Him. That was a hard lesson to learn...it took half my life just to get to this turning point. Your daughter is already on the right path...

Julie Musil said...

Wow, I'm amazed a child said something so insightful. You've got special children, and it's obvious they know they are loved.