"Leaving behind nights of terror and fear....I rise." Maya Angelou
My books have been selling...sold four yesterday...two more today. Sold almost 100 copies since it was released last month. And they're getting into bookstores. Four stores are carrying them now.
It feels strange...strange to read people's comments...to know they're talking about me... Many have emailed...telling me what they think of the book....what they think of me....They're saying what no one ever said. You went through so much. Too much. This is amazing. You survived!
At first their words shocked me. I had always thought it was normal, no big deal....not that bad. Maybe because I went through it alone...maybe because I never told anyone. No one ever knew. I didn't want anyone to know. I thought what happened was my fault. I thought I was bad, wrong, different...I thought I caused those things to happen in some weird way.
The words of kindness and affirmation that it was bad...are taking away that need in me to fight...to be on guard. I can feel something in me relaxing...softening...I don't want to fight anymore.
And something else - people are saying, If you can do it...I can too. My book is doing what I wanted. It's giving hope. It's pumping people to reach for their own freedom. That humbles me. I think He knew. He knew I would tell. He knew I would stand up. He knew I would give back. I feel scared and excited at the same time. I listen to Maya Angelou over and over...Her words 'and still I rise' empowering me...helping me know - I am becoming strong!
He is the core of my story. He is the One who broke chains when nothing else worked....I don't know how He did it....but He did. And if I can help just one person find freedom....find their way out of the darkness...than maybe everything I went through was all worth it.
The Old Fashion Way, Victorian Times.
6 months ago