Living Free

"My hope is to laugh as much as I cry...and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return. Maya Angelou

I've lost a lot of time.....running scared....fighting to survive....not sure if my life was worth much of anything. Since publishing and telling my story...
things have changed. I'm freer.....not weighed down with so much shame. It feels as if I've slipped off an oversized jacket that was too bulky and cumbersome....or put down a gigantic sack I carried everywhere I went...an immense weight that kept getting in the way.....

There's a ton of things I want to do....things I want to try.  Mostly...I want to keep my heart open to living free. 

Things feel new. It's like I'm experimenting with the world....and life....with living and being. I can look people in their eyes.....and let them look in mine....something I couldn't do before. I feel more comfortable in my skin...not detached as if I don't belong in it. 

Most mornings I wake up ready to face the world. I'm still amazed at how far down He went to pull me out of the darkness...that place where I had no hope....no faith that anything could ever change. But it did...Somehow the power of His gentleness made the difference.

I still need to withdraw....to be alone...to tune into my heart.....and listen for His gentle whisper that always gives me the assurance I'm not alone anymore....and everything's going to be okay. 

And I want to make a difference for others who are where I was...to shine hope....to let them know....nothing is impossible to overcome.Aboslutely nothing.

We're leaving in a couple of days for San Fransisco. I used to be afraid to leave home....but I've made a deal with myself....to trust...kick back....and have a ton of fun....